


Shane vs. the Reaper

by peppyk



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Carolina Reaper, Gen, Pepper Poppers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-26
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-09-20 03:40:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9473768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peppyk/pseuds/peppyk
Summary: Sam and Sebastian pull a lighthearted prank on everyone's favorite Joja worker, only to discover a chilling surprise...





	

**Author's Note:**

> thanx to my FRIENDS for beta reading!!!  
> Cyber  
> germadon  
> shadow

In the bushes by the saloon, two young men waited. One held a plate full of fresh, delicious looking pepper poppers, and looked at his friend with anticipation. The other seemed a little concerned.

“I think this is it, Sam. This is too far,” he whispered. “Shane’s rude, but I don't know if he deserves this...”

“Shh! C’mon, it's going to be funny, okay? It’s 5 pm, so he should be coming out of Joja by now,” said Sam, peeking out of the bush, then ducking back under cover.

“Ugh, fine. But if he starts coming after us with his chickens because of this, I’m telling him it was your idea.” Sebastian smiled, but then looked back at him. “Wait, where did you even get the peppers?”

“Huh, these babies? I ordered them online.” Sam grinned sadistically. “They're called Carolina Reapers. Hottest peppers in the world!”

“I know, you don't have to keep repeating that. And... you ordered them... just for this?”

“Shh, there he is!” Clutching the plate of pepper poppers and giving them another once over (more like thrice over) to ensure they looked at their peak of quality, Sam sprang up and Sebastian followed. “Hey, Shane!”

Their victim didn't look surprised at all, because Joja had drained him of all emotion. His eyes immediately went to the pepper poppers, but then back up to Sam and Sebastian. “Huh, where'd you come from?” His voice was tired and lifeless.

“That doesn't matter,” Sam said. “Um, I've recently started cooking as a hobby, and this is my first dish! I want you to have them, as a token of our friendship.” He gave the plate to Shane and smiled.

“...We aren't friends,” Shane said. “But... thanks! These are my favorite.” He looked at the pepper poppers in his arms like a mother with her baby. It kind of grossed Sebastian out.

They stood there. “Why don't you try one?” Sam suggested painfully.

“Sure,” said Shane. He took a pepper popper from the tainted pepper popper plate, and took a fiery hell bite. “Mmm,” he said in a monotone. He finished the reaper popper. “That was good. Needed a little more spice, though- ...are you okay?” But his words did nothing to appease Sam and Sebastian’s looks of horror.

“...We’re fine, just... overloaded with joy that you liked it!” Sebastian said hastily when Sam said nothing, making eye contact with Shane and seeing only the unfeeling voids of Joja’s touch.

“Okay... thanks again. Bye.” Shane forced a little smile and then speedwalked into the saloon.

Once he was inside, Sebastian turned to Sam. “...Um, did you mix any regular peppers into it?”

“No... That thing was pure reaper poppers.”

“...Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“I think you should quit your job at Joja.”

“You said it...”


End file.
